Sunday, June 6, 2010

New diaper cake

Well, here is my 2nd one.  I asked DH how much he would pay for one of these and he said $20.  Bwahahaha!  The diapers cost more than that (+ ribbon, toys, lotion, butt paste, etc).  The baby shower was nice, and of course I left there feeling more of that ache for another child.  No clue that it could get worse but it did. 

I haven't had a good day today.  Some days are like that...depressed about it all, and I am trying so hard to come to terms with the fact that Chloe might be it.  She might be our one miracle.  I have been trying to convince myself that it is ok, but it isn't.  God might not want to bless us again for some reason. I will never understand and I will probably be upset about it for a really long time. 

I have slowly started giving away all the the baby stuff I held onto thinking that I would have gotten pregnant again in the last 3+ years.  I have to move the stroller/car seat combo thing out of the garage.  It is a constant reminder.  I hate to get rid of things like that though because if I do end up pregnant again I probably won't get as much at another baby shower...which is silly because Chloe is so much older than most other kids with younger siblings that we know...

And I am done...   

4 comments:

  1. I know how you feel. I am giving away all of our baby stuff right now also. It is so hard. Baby showers are still hard for me also. I truely hope that God does bless you with one more child. You sound like a wonderful woman and mom. Pez

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  2. Well thank you! I wish you the same...serious baby vibes!!!

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  3. I am sorry too...
    It's funny...you would be jealous of me for having a pretty normal cycle, while I am jealous of you for your beautiful daughter.
    Maybe one day i will have a kid, and you will have a sibling for your cutie pie.
    : (
    I think the worst part for me is, I don't know if anything is wrong or not...I hope you hang in there.

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  4. Laura - have you been seeing an doc about it? I hope you can get a diagnosis! Have you had an HSG?

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