Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Everything happens for a reason...(and a pic)

I think I might start posting a pic every day to cheer me up.  Today it is a pic of my DD, finally getting the hang of the photo editing software, I will have to edit the crap out of all my pics from Europe also...;)

Yea...I really don't believe in everything happening for a reason anymore.  I mean I used to, but after all of this TTC stuff I don't believe it anymore.  Chloe was the best thing that happened to us, I will never change that line of thinking.  What makes me different from so many other women?  This mess is supposed to help me feel stronger?  WTH???  How do so many other women out there have no issues TTC?  What about the drug addicts?  They get pregnant for a reason?  What reason?  To bring a crack baby into this world?  My mom used to deliver babies and she said that is the worst thing in the world to see...a lady all strung out on crack and then this pitiful drug addicted baby being brought into this world...what good reason would that happen for?  If I hear one person say that everything happens for a reason I think I just might scream!  I don't say everything happens for a reason when a close relative of a friend dies...so please...think before you say things like this to a woman suffering from infertility.  It may seem like nothing that would offend, but at least from my experience I am extremely sensitive to all things TTC...and I am NOT a sensitive person.  Not. at. all.

Believing that everything happens for a reason used to be easy for me.  But after all this time waiting for that chance to just ovulate I can't come to terms with what the reason could be that I (we) are suffering so much waiting for another child.  Maybe the reason is that some people have to go through more in life...I am not any stronger than the next gal, and maybe everything in life doesn't have to have a reason behind it...

1 comment:

  1. I hate to hear the pain and frustration in your post. I totally understand that pain!! I appreciate that you are open and honest with your feelings and emotions. I am praying for you that you will have a renewed sense of peace, comfort and purpose.