So, as you all know I am having a rough time getting pregnant again. The first time around was no cake walk either. When I was 19 I was told that I would never have children. Then after seeing a doctor once I got stationed in Italy (3 years later, I was 23ish) I was told I would have to see a fertility specialist when we moved back to the US. A bit over 2 years after that we got pregnant with Chloe. I must have spontaneously ovulated.
Since then it has been a battle. Infertility is defined as: Not able to conceive after a year of regular intercourse without contraception. Secondary infertility refers to a couple who has successfully had children in the past, but when they try to have more children, they are unable to achieve pregnancy after one year of unprotected sex.
I got a little upset the other day when a friend compared me to other women who had problems TTC #2. One women tried for 8 months, and once she had figured out she ovulated later than she thought she ended up pregnant. Lucky lady! Here I sit with 3+ years under my belt (and that is just how long we've been TTC#2, we haven't ever prevented pregnancy in our whole relationship = 11+ years). I hope my friend isn't mad at me for writing all of this on here, but I just wanted to get this out there to make sure that people know that just because you already have a child doesn't mean that you are not infertile (my OB thought this also and he thought it would just take time since I already had a child, well I wasted almost 3 years of my life with him), I suffered from primary infertility for over 5 years and then a miracle happened, my little girl. And now I suffer from secondary infertility and I am trying to beat it. Trying my best...and trying not to go insane in the process.
Sometimes it might take a women a little longer than she thinks...especially if she has not pinpointed ovulation. Just because you have a 28 day cycle that doesn't mean that you ovulate on cd14. Some women ovulate on cd16 or even cd18. If you know you are ovulating, the best way to try for pregnancy is to have "relations" every other day. That way the "guys" can build back up...;) I had a feeling I wasn'[t ovulating...well, I knew I wasn't all the months I didn't have a cycle. But the months I was having a cycle I thought I had a chance...well, nope. No ovulation there either.
So here I sit. Waiting and waiting for the next step...then once that begins I have 2 weeks on BCP and then Lupron (for down regulation) and then I can start the injectable drugs yet again. Hopefully the result is a bit better this time and I don't become a follicle farm again. Something else that we might try if we have time before the November IVF cycle is Femara, I have read success stories of women with PCOS that tried it after Clomid failed to help them ovulate. And one of the ladies on one of my message boards got her BFP on it while she was waiting to save for IVF. She gave me a lot of hope!
The timeline for all of this is up in the air. My injectable cycles take a looooong time, but if this works this time and doesn't get cancelled and I actually ovulate, I think I have a great chance. That has to be the issue...Fingers crossed!
Secondary IF is rough...sometimes I have guilt at longing for another child when there are so many women out there who don't have any children.
ReplyDeleteLike you, my DH and I have been "trying" for kid #2 for 3+ years now...we find out our next steps at the Obgyn this August. I'm trying not to be overly anxious. The waiting is difficult!
Thanks for sharing your story. Wishing you success as you move on to the next part of your TTC journey.
You too, and thanks for reading...
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