As I sit and think about the last 4 or so years, I have come to the realization that I have changed. I went from being a happy mom of a 1.5 year old awesome little girl, to a pretty bitter infertile lady, then a lady that had a pregnancy taken away from her (still a bittter infertile lady), and now I am a scared pregnant lady. Scared of something going wrong, scared of the unknown...well, just plain scared.
I have been invited to probably around 10 baby showers in the last 3 years and how many did I end up going to? Only 3. And 2 of those showers were last year after I started this blog...which has been a great emotional outlet.
Looking back I just want to kick myself. Why didn't the OB believe me? Just because you have a child (which by the way was not an easy task either! 5 years and lots of heartache) doesn't mean you aren't suffering from SIF. I am so thankful to have found an awesome RE that understands and invited me back again next year after this little miracle blesses us with his/her smiling face...:) Maybe we will try for another? Maybe not, but having that option feels like an absolute blessing.