Friday, August 27, 2010

Infertility...and then pregnancy...

I have lost a follower and I am sure I will lose more.  There are some blogs that I stopped following (or checking up on) as the blogger became pregnant.  It stung.  Then the blog turns into a pregnancy blog, and how the bean is doing, etc.  So, unless they were a close bloggie friend, I stopped visiting their blog.  No hard feelings here.  I have struggled with this for 10+ years and over the last year (since my miscarriage) I have grown so much as a person.  The last baby shower I went to was over 2 years ago, yet this year I changed my tune.  I helped a friend register at Babies R Us (evil place for an infertile), and I went to 2 baby showers and made a cute diaper cake for each one.    

The thing about being pregnant after infertility is that it is hard not to write about the pregnancy.  The fears you feel, the questions about what is normal in pregnancy (I had a pretty healthy healthy pregnancy with DD, then another 5 years of IF, then m/c I experienced last year has me a bit freaked out with this pregnancy).  It is almost like you are still alone in your struggle, you have left your infertile friends but the pregnant ones don't understand what you had to go through to get where you are.  This pregnancy is a HUGE deal to me (not that pregnancy isn't to fertile women) and I feel proud to have finally made it here.    

When speaking of infertility, a lot of people don't understand...sure, I have one child, she is the greatest thing that happened to me.  I struggled to get pregnant with her (so many people I know don't know that and I never broadcasted it), and I have been struggling again for 3+ years to get pregnant again.  So yes, I still consider myself infertile.  I am pregnant (at the moment) but I will suffer through this infertility battle every single time I try to get pregnant.      


  1. I totally understand your feelings. Remember that this blog is YOUR blog. If people can't handle reading it because you're pregnant, then so be it. As you said, no hard feelings. But you should absolutely celebrate this pregnancy and ask your questions about what is normal or not. You've struggled enough yourself and shouldn't feel any guilt whatsoever about posting about your pregnancy (and your eventual child)! I'm so excited for you that you're pregnant. Hooray!

  2. I have lost 2 followers, as best I can tell. And I get it...It's difficult, but yes, we still need this outlet. There's no way around that. But I get it. And it makes me sad, but hopefully we find other friends, and when people are ready, they will come back....

  3. I won't befriend you Erica!!! I promise ;)

    Whether you are fertile, infertile, pregnant, or not pregnant I will always consider you my friend!!! And an old drinking buddy from back in the day!!!

    I am so happy for you ;)

  4. ummmm how about defriend you...LOL sorry girl, really tired!!!

  5. I totally understand and am sooooo happy for you! Infertility is hard enough no matter how many babies you already deserve every minute of your moment! :) Congrats!!

  6. I changed my url...wanted to let you know!